And They Probably Won’t Even Offer To Pay For Their Own College Education
Have you ever thought about having a child?
I’m not talking to all of you that already have children. So if that’s you, just skip this whole post because it could potentially come off as insensitive and basically a huge overgeneralization which is exactly how I’m meaning it to sound sooooo-
No but really, have you? Thought about it? Babies?
I’m not scared to say that the idea has crossed my mind, and immedietly been shit out of my mind’s butt hole. Ever since I found out where babies came from i.e. “the man pulls down his pants and pees on the lady and then she bleeds blood and then she’s has the baby”, I’ve sworn none shall pass through me.
Once, during a discussion in a college Intro to Philosophy class, a lady-classmate of mine who at the time had 3 kids of her own told me I was “selfish for not wanting children”. To which I responded that I thought it was pretty selfish that she had three of them taking up so much of the oxygen that the good honest people that were born before them needed. And also, it might be kind of selfish that she was deciding to spend her time in school instead of taking care of her kids. Burn.
Ahem…
She might have hit a nerve.
So turns out I was pretty sensitive to the word “selfish”. But now I’ve realized (along with many other 20somethings) that, well, I am. I’m selfish. At least part of the time. But I’ve made peace with the trait. And really, it shouldn’t be such a negative descriptor. What’s wrong with thinking about your own self interest once in while?
Be selfish when you want to screw over a shitty job for a chance opportunity. Be selfish when it comes to moving to wherever you feel to you need to live. Be selfish and break it off when you know you’re not engaged to the right person, #DRAMA!. Be selfish when it comes to making yourself actually, seriously, happy. And also, be selfish when you decide that you don’t want to bring another selfish person in to the world. Because if you do that now, you’ll probably never get to go to Amsterdam like you wanted to. At least not for probably another 18+ years and then it won’t even be fun.
For all the half-serious reasons that I usually give for not wanting a child, I think there are just as many serious ones. What if my child dies before me? What if they suffer a terrible accident or debilitating disease that I can’t fix? What if they hate my lasagna?
I just don’t think I could handle it.
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